Dork Diaries Portable: Miss Penelope

So no, I am not a fairy godmother. I don’t wave a wand. I carry hand sanitizer and patience forged in the fires of a thousand tantrums. But that day, Miss Penelope Dork Diaries taught me something:

I sat down on the floor next to her. The headphones came off. This was not a noise-canceling situation. This was a sit-in-the-mud situation.

“Your grandmother wrote in it,” I said. miss penelope dork diaries

“The best nanny is the one who stays for the mess, not the mansion.”

“I’m fairly certain I am.”

Reality: I walked into the playroom to find her using a tube of Mrs. Wellington-Calloway’s “Limited Edition Himalayan Saffron Night Cream” (retail: $900) to draw a unicorn on the cat. The cat, Mr. Snuggles, looked less like a pet and more like a jaundiced gremlin.

“Yes, Miss Chaos Demon?”

I folded the paper and put it in my pocket. Right next to my spare wet wipes.