Day one set the tone. The celebrities were dropped not via helicopter, but via a rickety, goat-filled fishing boat onto a rocky cove. Within three hours, Kati Gaga refused to enter her hammock because “the moonlight has a glare.” Aris tried to establish a “merit-based ration system,” sparking a screaming match with a beloved 70-year-old soap opera grandmother, .

The season’s defining moment came on Day 14. With food supplies critically low—Aris had accidentally burned the rice supply trying to cook it in seawater—Fiona led a mutiny. Using contraband oregano (smuggled in by a sympathetic producer) and a discarded tin can, she created a makeshift spit. She convinced Kati Gaga to distract the camp’s “camp leader” (Aris) by fake-fainting over a fake scorpion, while Fiona and Yiayia roasted a lizard they’d caught. The result? A “souvlaki” so aromatic that even the camera crew begged for a bite. The clip went viral globally, racking up 200 million views in 48 hours.

Her coronation speech: “You threw me in the mud. You gave me testicles to eat. And you showed me that redemption tastes better than any Michelin star. Now please—someone get me a real souvlaki and a plane ticket home.”